I originally published this post in 2016. I think more people are considering tidying up and downsizing with the popularity of Marie Kondo’s book “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up”. She has great ideas that make it easy to start the process.
We moved into our Little House in April of 2016. It is small but we LOVE it!
Our Little House
No, it’s not a joke. We live in a 780 sq. ft. house with no basement. It surprises a lot of people, especially since we sell homes for a living. But here’s the truth — we were willing to squeeze into this cozy home because we wanted to live on the water. The beauty of lakeside living, combined with the desire for less to maintain, made the choice clear. We craved more time to enjoy the views, the sunsets, and the simple pleasures of living by the lake.
Rightsizing: A Positive Approach to Change
“Downsizing” is often seen as a dirty word — a daunting concept, even. Why give up what you’ve worked so hard to achieve? A comfortable, spacious home filled with furniture and keepsakes that have provided comfort and security over the years? But for us, the dream of living on the water meant we had to rightsize to fit into our newly renovated little house.
Rightsizing is a more positive way of looking at the process of simplifying our possessions to align with our needs and lifestyle. It’s about making intentional choices to live with what truly serves us, instead of what we feel obligated to keep.
Thankfully, we had a good friend who helped coach us through the difficult process of possession purging. It was a challenge! We were surprised by how much emotion a simple glass dish could bring up when we considered sending it to Goodwill. To make it even more complicated, the Little House came with all of the former owner’s belongings. It’s almost unheard of to purchase a home with all the previous owner’s things still in it, but you might find yourself sorting through someone else’s possessions someday — whether it’s a relative’s belongings or the things of a friend who is unable to sort their own life out. (See my thoughts on Helping Others Move for more on that.)
Should It Stay or Should It Go?
The decision to part with things isn’t always straightforward. There are many reasons we hold on to items, and many of them have emotional roots. Here are the three most common types of guilt we face when it comes to letting go:
- Emotional Guilt: We hold on to things because they were gifts, or because they’ve been in the family for years. How can we get rid of grandma’s teacup or the artwork our kids made for us?
- Aspirational Guilt: We hang on to things because, one day, we’ll learn to play that guitar, finish the scrapbook, or finally knit that sweater. The idea that “someday” we’ll use it keeps us holding on.
- Financial Guilt: We spent a lot of money on it — it must be worth something. Or we’re convinced that we’ll eventually get some of our investment back if we sell it.
As we tackled the task of rightsizing, we had to ask ourselves some important questions about each item:
- Is it still useful?
- Do I still use it? Did I use it in the past year?
- Is it truly a family heirloom, or am I just keeping it out of guilt?
- How much would it cost to replace it at Goodwill, if I ever wanted it again in a few years?
- Can I repurpose it for something new and useful in my little house?
- Does it fit in my new space?
- Can I keep the memory by taking a photo instead of the item? (For example, I can remember the milk can turned into a floor lamp — without actually having it clutter up my space.)
- Does anyone I know need it more than I do?
Once I decided to part with an item, I also had to ask: How should I get rid of it? Here are some more practical questions that helped:
Is it worth taking to a consignment store, or just dropping it off at a thrift store?
How much is it worth?
Should I sell it on Craigslist or donate it to a charity?
The “It Might Be Worth Something” Dilemma
One of the hardest hurdles is the “But it might be worth something!” mindset. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that you can somehow recoup the money spent on your possessions. But here’s the reality: 98.5% of the time, you’ve already spent the money when you purchased the item, so it’s better to let go and stop worrying about recouping it. If the item served its purpose or brought you joy at one time, it’s okay to pass it on to someone else who can benefit from it now.
If you truly believe it’s worth something, you can try selling it on platforms like Facebook Market place, Craigslist or eBay, or take it to a consignment store. However, before you get caught up in the effort, ask yourself: How much is your time really worth? Having a garage sale can be fun, but you might find that the return on your investment of time isn’t as high as you expected. Sometimes, donating it to a thrift store might be the most efficient way forward.
Rightsizing Sounds Simple, But It’s Not
Rightsizing can sound easy, but it’s a lot of work — and a lot of tough decisions. That’s why it’s helpful to have someone by your side who can help you stay objective. Start with the less emotional items like clothing and books, and save the more sentimental things, like photos or family heirlooms, for later. For my husband and me, the reward has been living with less and feeling lighter. We’re now able to enjoy the sunsets more and don’t miss the divided relish tray quite as much as I thought I would!
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